So my hubby asked me the other day what a fourth trimester is? Its super funny he asks because we read at least three books on the subject and bunch of blogs plus he is a neonatologist. Aren’t they supposed to be experts…guess not.
So fourth trimester is a concept invented or perhaps advertised by Dr.Karp, the author of the best selling books and Dvd’s “happiest baby on the block”. His basic argument is that when babies are born they are not really ready for birth. He argues that we have to maintain womb like atmosphere for the babies for the first three months of their lives.When I had my son, I was familiar with the concept but it really did not mean much to me. But looking back I can see that those first three months with a new born are very different.
Womb like atmosphere (the five s’s):
Swaddling: Tight swaddling recreates the confinement of the womb.
Side/Stomach position: Holding the baby on the right side slightly face down.
Shushing: Karp uses a loud “ssh” sound similar to the loud white noise that is present in the womb.
Swinging (and jiggling): Gentle but constant jiggling (especially of the head) is intended to remind babies of the constant motion they experienced in the womb.
Sucking: Karp also recommends the use of pacifiers
NOTE: If you are in India, we have this cloth slings that hang from the roof these slings work best for babies as they swaddle them as well as provide motion so clearly taking care of two of the five s’s. There is a reason for traditions and customs so stick to things that have worked for centuries, if you can get a sling that can hang from the roof..that would work great. I cannot swear by it as we never had one..but of course we all grew up in them so they must be working.
The other part of the first three months is that babies tummies are as small as a marble when they are born and breast milk digests super fast. So if you are breast feeding your baby, be patient as they will need to feed every 2 to 3 hours. If you can get a breast pump and have a caretaker feed your baby it might give mom some rest. Experts recommend that you exclusively breast feed (no bottles) for atleast 8 weeks and once your milk supply is established and your baby is latching well you can start giving him bottles. Enjoy the time with your little one ladies, it just goes by fast…as my dear friend likes to say, “Days are long but Years are short” before you know it your son will be a year old and running away from you.
If you want to read up on Dr.Karp’s techniques here are some other interesting posts
My baby is one year old now. Cannot believe how fast the time goes. Krish’s accomplishments so far: Plays peek-a-boo from the moment he wakes up till he sleeps; crawls all over the house when we play Hide and seek (Donga police); cruises (walking with support) all around the house; Can stack up his cups into a tower; can sort shapes into their box; follows mommy to kitchen and Bangs dishes on the floor with great vigor, Crawls really really fast in to the kitchen when fridge or dishwasher is opened; kisses mommy and daddy with so much passion and love, that it hurts (especially since he has new teeth); crawls into mommy’s lap with a book and turns pages as we read (Hop on Pop for the 1000th time); sings himself to sleep; splashes the water in tub; lifts his hands when putting on his shirt; Wakes you up with kisses all over your face and a smile that will melt your heart; has figured out how to switch off and on the light; Can give you a scathing look if he does not like what you are doing; can eat a slice of apple by himself; holds on to a boiled egg and eats it carefully so it does not break.
Everything that he does is fascinating, new and filled with passion. I have never had a better year in my life…this year with my baby is the best year of my life. I am blessed beyond belief, he makes me laugh till I cry, he makes me sad, so far he has not made me mad or angry…but I think that day will come soon enough.
I also should thank my darling hubby, who has been part of this beautiful adventure of our Life. DH (Dear Husband) and Krish share this beautiful bond that some times makes me jealous. But DH has been the best dad that I had ever known, he is never too tired (even after a 30 hour duty, or 2 days of stomach flu) to play with Krish. He worries about krish so much that it make my head hurt (he is a schedule freak but so is Krish) . Being a Dad comes naturally to DH, he is loving, caring, patient, mischevious, and adventurous. DH is never worried about getting dirty with his son, he is never worried about getting wet, if something makes Krish happy he will do that in a heartbeat. This year has shown me a different face of my husband, one that is patient, mischevious, methodical, and at the same time fun filled. He made this journey so much more fun and beautiful.
We are proud parents of a beautiful, bubbly, lovely, energetic, passionate, most kissable baby ever to crawl on this earth. Thanks to all our friends and family who made this journey so much more memorable.
Its raining here today, its not too cold but just rain.I have never hated rain this bad before but today was just not my day. So I woke up without a hitch took bath, cooked breakfast for hubby (Idli) who had to run out at the ungodly hour of 7:00 am, woke krish up gave him a bath, fed him and then started preparing his food and our dinner. Finally we were ready to head out the door at 8:30 am and then the fun began in earnest
So I had krish in one arm, had my 15″ laptop bag (very cute red leather and get compliments all the time about the bag) packed to the brink with my snacks (Stoufers lunch, yogurt, banana chips, apple etc) and then Krish’s bag (packed with milk, avocado puree, liver mousse, Khicdi (indian rice dish for kids)). Typically I can balance all these stuff barely..till I get into the car…but did I say it was raining so I had to balance all this stuff and the umbrella (BTW I am 24 weeks pregnant so balancing anything is a big deal) plus I had to wear my big jacket. I am very petite and have tiny tiny shoulder so keeping a bag on my shoulders is usually difficult let alone with a winter jacket and a toddler in tow.
So any way I manage to get out into the rain and all the way near our parking lot. Just before reaching my car my hands give up I cannot carry the bags any more, so I decide to leave the bags in our lobby area and take Krish with me to the Car. So I open the car up, buckle my bundle of joy (who is tiny by the way he is not a big boy) and run back to get my bags in the lobby…but realize that I left my door keys in the bag which I left behind the locked door. I frantically push all the neighbors intercoms hoping that some body would be in and let me in…..after a frantic 1 whole minute wait, our favorite neighbor answers and says that he will come open the door…so I wait (before running back and forth to make sure Krish is still ok in the car seat.) Finally our neighbor comes down and opens the door and I ask him if his buzzer was not working and he could have opened the door from his house…he said he completely forgot about that option. any way I frantically get my bags and rush back in to the car thanking the GODS a little too early.
I FORGOT MY GLASSES. so here we go again…unbuckle Krish…carry the umbrella walk slowly while running in my mind (remember no running especially when you are pregnant and carrying a toddler while the floor is slippery) finally go upstairs find my glasses in Krish’s room on his changing table (wonder when that happened) and again walk back down slowly and carefully trying not to slip. Make it safely to the car, buckle Krish up and leave home before some thing else happens.
So now here is a thought how am I going to do all of this when I have an infant, a toddler, three bags at least (my laptop bag, baby bag plus my breast pump). Arghhhhhhhhhhhh
Krish, my son and I have the sweetest and best sleep and wake up schedules.
We are co sleeping, and have attached his crib (pulled really close) to our bed and after he has his bath and oil massage, we read a few books. Krish then crawls in to his crib around 7:30, I lie down next to him switch off all the lights and start the soothing sounds sheep on. Then starts the cuddling…..Krish moves around his crib trying to find the best position to sleep, he comes to me gives mommy some very sweet wet kisses….he then chews on my fingers (since he is teething). This goes on for a few minutes…some times he will come and kiss my belly (I am six months pregnant so he gives a lot of wet kisses to my belly). some time he will play with my hair…pull it out and see how long it is. I am always amazed by how gentle and loving he is. All the time, I try not to make a noise, I dont want to encourage him to keep on playing but at the same time I want to extend our special time together. He usually falls asleep in 15 to 20 minutes…but he does show his love in those few minutes..I am left wanting more.
And then when the morning comes around (around 6:00 am) I am not a morning person…but the moment he tries to find me, if i am not sleeping next to him, he will crawl over his dad and come to mommy. He will then give me the sweetest gentlest kisses and tries to wake me up with his cuddles and kisses. I always joke and say he is the sweetest alarm clock I ever had. He keeps drowsing back to sleep some times, but he is persistent and we are both up and brushing our teeth by 6:30 am. I know a day will come when he will not want a hug or a kiss from his old lady, but I hope i will remember these nights and early morning hours in later years and cherish these memories forever.
I am really worried how our routines and cuddles will change once we have baby #2, I just hope that I will have the energy to continue the night time and day time routines even after baby#2.
This is my entry to the Blogorama, I wanted to start this blog as a way to chronicle all my adventures as a mom of one and a full time PhD student. Juggling motherhood and studies. Being a mom adds a whole new dimension to life, its one of life’s biggest adventures, its also the most memorable time of the day. Every day my 12 month old son does some thing that takes my breath away, and makes me feel proud. I want to chronicle all those precious memories some where and felt that blogging might be a away to do it.
I am expecting my second son on May 13 of this year, the new addition will add more color and confusion to our lives. we have finally reached a stage in parenthood where things make sense and parenting is rewarded with cuddles and wet kisses. I am not sure if I am ready to enter the black hole for fourth trimester yet. Its pretty scary and more scary if you think you have to endure the entire 4th trimester with an 18 month old, who survives on schedule. I hope the blogging community will be a place where I can shell out my frustration, yell out to my hearts content and be truly myself.